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Tip 530: Use cliché answers with care. |
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Say someone approaches you in the company cafeteria and asks, "So how is the Fullerton deal moving along?" You answer: "Pretty good." Similar answers to similar questions follow these lines: "Same song, second verse." "So-so." ''It's still on target." "Fair to partly cloudy. We're hanging in there." All such clichés create distance. If the other person has asked the question as a show of interest or wants straightforward information, he or she will be put off. If you routinely deflect honest questions with pat answers, people will stop asking about your concerns, feelings, and opinions. They'll decide you do not want to communicate sincerely with them. |
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Tip 531: Know when flippant answers are out of line. |
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Having a sense of humor is an advantage in any situation, but flippant answers about serious issues or during a time crunch frustrate people. Some people find themselves tossing out humor when they can't face issues squarely. Try to identify those times when you're using humor as an avoidance technique. Recognize that even humor, however generally welcome and refreshing, has a time and place. |
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Tip 532: Don't bomb when a BB gun will do. |
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Some people tend to overanswer when asked a simple question and get a reputation for that sort of thing. Nine-year-old Matthew, sitting in front of the TV one night, asked his father: "What does centrifugal force mean?" Dad: "Go ask your mother, I'm busy." Son: "That's okay. I don't think I want to know that much about it." |
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Why do people respond to a question with a bomb when a BB gun would do? Some talk until they come to an acceptable answer. Others react to their ego-need to show off vast knowledge on the subject. Others aren't sure their answer is clear, so they keep explaining until they get some feedback that shows understanding. Others give a lengthy answer because they fear a brief answer would sound curt. Some people feel defensive or consider their answers inadequate, so they keep attempting to justify their positions. Still others don't fully understand the question, so they talk all around the issue, hoping to say something pertinent and helpful. Whatever the reason for overanswering, use the BB gun on first attempt. Leave it to your listener to ask for a more in-depth answer. |
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