|
|
|
|
|
|
|
extra time with them, give attention to their hobby or family, or concede a point. Thoughtfulness in any of these ways returns dividends. Giving something makes the other person feel as though he or she should reciprocate. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Tip 691: Ask questions to set the tone for mutual advantage. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Some people fear a negotiating situation because they fear confrontation. So it's important to set the tone of a mutually rewarding discussion. Try questions like these: "What would you like to have as an outcome today?" "What things do you need from me?" "How can we help you in this situation?" "What are your goals?" "What things do you think we already have in common?'' "What more can I tell you about my situation?" "What else can you tell me about your situation that would help me understand your perspective and needs?" "What ideas do you have for generating a more workable solution?" |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
How do you know if you've come to a good, cooperative agreement? Everybody involved will think the agreement is the best possible one. No one will feel "worse off" than before the agreement. Both people continue to have respect for the other and may even feel better about the other person. And finally, this agreement may result in even greater benefits than either of you thought possible. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Tip 692: Know how to phrase your probing questions. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Consider the difference in each of these pairs of questions: |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
1. "Do you mind if I come in an hour early every day next month so that I can leave early enough to take my son to soccer practice in the afternoons?" versus "Do you mind if I come in an hour early every day next month so that I can work without interruptions? I'd hate to leave things unfinished when I take off early to take my son to soccer practice." |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
2. "Can I wait to deliver his contract until I'm out for lunch?" versus "Would you like me to deliver this contract while I'm out for lunch?" |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
3. "Are you the only one who can make these kinds of decisions on bulk orders?" versus "Do all the decisions on bulk orders fall on your desk?" |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Phrasing determines emphasis, and emphasis determines response. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Tip 693: Postpone any discussions when you're surprised by a "Bomb Scare." |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Here's the situation: You're trying to sell uniforms for servers at a large restaurant chain, as well as your laundry service for the uniforms. Just as |
|
|
|
|
|