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Tip 346: Don't make the other person wrong for you to be right. |
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Ego blinds people to logic. Let the other person save face if he or she wants to agree with you: "Perhaps you didn't have access to the data I just received. . . ." or "The situation has changed drastically since you were last briefed. . . ." or "Despite what he told you, the customer has obviously changed her mind again. Here's her latest wish. . . ." |
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Tip 347: Minimize stress for the other person. |
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Putting the other person under psychological stress does not pressure that person to go along with you and "get it over with." Although as parents we might tend to believe differently, kids do attempt to wear us down with their whining and complaining. But studies show that not to be case in the workplace. If people feel pressured to decide something, they'll usually cling to the status quo rather than make a change. |
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Tip 348: Hold the sarcasm; Avoid detractors. |
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No matter how "outmoded," "primitive," "ridiculous," or "wasteful" the current plan, procedure, or product is, hold your labels and associated sarcasm. People identify closely with what goes on in their departments and within their areas of responsibilities. The reaction is much the same as when you put down others' hometowns. They can disparage it all they want to, but they won't permit an outsider to do so. |
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Tip 349: Avoid frames as power plays. |
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Emphasizing that you're the celebrity engineer who holds the patent frames you in a more powerful position than your listeners. Reminding the employees in the warehouse that you write their paychecks will not go over well if you're using that position to persuade them to participate on the company softball team. People resent those who rattle their sabers. |
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Tip 350: Lower others' guard with graciousness. |
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Alcoholics Anonymous and hundreds of other self-help groups can verify this truth: You cannot motivate people from the outside; their motivation has to be internal. People are more motivated to believe you, help you, or |
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