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Tip 452: Be wary about not listening for what you don't want to hear. |
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A regional manager of a construction firm had a long talk with his vice president to express dissatisfaction with what he considered were misleading comments made to customers. "You tell customers we're not just a contractorthat we have our own manufacturers for the cabinetry we install in the office buildings. But a warehouse with a table saw is not a manufacturer. I don't like misleading people." The vice president soothed the manager's convictions with promises that they had plans to get into the manufacturing side shortly. |
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As time went on, there were other such discussions. The regional manager told the vice president he was upset about late commission checks and unnecessary requested travel. Each time the vice president soothed his feelings, agreed that things were not as they should be, and promised improvements. |
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Six months later, when the regional manager offered his resignation, the vice president looked shocked. "You pull in more business than all the other regions put together. You can't leave. What will it take to make you change your mind? How much raise do you want?" |
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Whatever the specific mindsetthey're worried, upset, misguided, uninformed, or dumbpeople don't hear what they don't want to hear. |
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Tip 453: Avoid an in-and-out pattern. |
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Because we listen four to six times faster than someone talks, wandering ears become a temptation. We fade in and out just like channels on a TV. Become aware of this habit by forcing yourself to do something constructive with the extra listening time: Chunk the information and learn it as you hear it, make notes, or analyze comments. Just stay tuned. |
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Tip 454: Listen all the way to the end; Don't assume. |
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Doctors and their patients provide the best illustrations of this common weakness. After the doctor has seen three patients during the morning, all complaining about vomiting, diarrhea, and upper respiratory problems, the fourth patient gets half an ear. The doctor begins to write out the prescription while the patient finishes the symptoms. I would venture a guess that our health-care system pays for a great many unnecessary medical procedures and tests exactly for this reason. |
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Listening costs less than testing. The one word "not" can make a whopping difference in someone's meaning. That's why shipping departments find it necessary to print statements in this manner: "This is a packing slip, not an invoice." |
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