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There's not much chance of improvement when you end a meeting without a clue as to what or how to do things differently. What will it take to improve the situation? Ask for specifics, or offer specifics to see if they're acceptable to the other person. Gain agreement, and set timelines. |
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Tip 649: If you can't change, cancel bitterness as an alternative. |
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If someone comments that because of your height you don't command respect as a leader, you're going to find yourself in a tough spot to grow a few inches. If someone suggests that because you haven't had broad managerial experience you're unable to supervise your unit, you're going to find it difficult to reconstruct your work history. Instead of growing bitter at the comments, judgments, labels, and prejudices, choose another alternative. Either determine how to prove the person wrong, change your goal, or decide that person's assessment doesn't count. Bitterness over what you can't change creeps into the crevices like a cancer until it colors all your interactions with others. |
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Tip 650: keep yourself physically and spiritually strong. |
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Our emotional stability for dealing with complaints is closely related to our physical and spiritual condition at the time. If you're feeling lousy with a sinus infection, irritable because you haven't gotten a good night's sleep in a week, or depressed because of your lack of worthwhile personal goals, criticisms will cut deeper than normal. Guard your outlook on life and your physical ability to meet challenges. |
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Tip 651: Recall your list of strengths. |
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If you're not a great supervisor, remind yourself that you're a great father. If you can't sell or learn to sell, then remind yourself how well you organize other tasks. If you can't speak well before large groups, recall how well you give advice one on one. If necessary and if you work for an overly critical boss who focuses on the negative with little attention to the positive, write out a list of your strengths and post them where you can refer to them quickly in moments of high emotional crisis. Focus on your strengths if you lose your equilibrium. Strive for balance. |
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