Not: "They can't correct that problem until they redesign the motor."
But: "When they redesign the motor, they're going to correct that problem."
Not: "Our managers don't communicate with each other."
But: "Our managers should find ways to communicate about cross-departmental projects on a regular basis."
Not: "We'll have to go into debt."
But: "We will issue bonds."
The positive message or instruction sinks in easier, further, faster.
Tip 64: Place positive statements before neutral ones.
A husband and wife sit down to the dinner table for a bowl of soup. She tastes the soup and says, "Did you put oregano in this soup?" He responds, "Yes, I certainly did. But not enough for you to taste ityou're so particular. You're going to know the next time I volunteer to cook dinner." She would have gotten a much better response with a positive lead-in: "This soup tastes different somehow. I like it. Did you put oregano in it?"
When people hear a neutral statement, they may be tempted to "read into it" past conversations or react defensively for any number of reasons. Better to use the positive statement first so the person knows how to interpret what follows.
Tip 65: Express your opinions as opinions rather than irrefutable dacts.
The difference is usually one of tone and word choice:
Fact: "The contract will turn on delivery date. We'll lose them."
Opinion: "I think the contract will turn on delivery date. I'm afraid we'll lose them."
Fact: "Gary will resign if we don't give him this raise."
Opinion: "Gary has been interviewing with other firms. I think he'll resign if we don't come through with this raise."
Others will be less defensive with such wording, and you'll save face if you're wrong.
