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wore 100 percent cotton, nothing less. Now you count every penny you spend. You hunt for sales at K-Mart and Filene's Basement, let your hair grow fashionably long, and swallow your pride when accepting hand-me-downs for your kids. Dinner is, more often than not, pasta. (So what, it's healthy.) And a night out on the town means renting a video from the new release rack at the local video store. In short, your former life seems so impossibly extravagant you can't imagine how you ever spent money in so cavalier a fashion. You wonder if you will ever again be able to enjoy what you now think of as the luxuries of a distant past. |
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Unless you are wealthy, if you have been married for a long time, and especially if you have children, you are likely to inhabit a different financial planet after the divorce. |
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For one thing, you and your ex-spouse each need a home. If there are children, one parentthe residential parentwill be sustaining a home on less money than before. That parent might need to go out and get a job, even if he or she has not previously worked. |
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The nonresidential parent, meanwhile, will be helping to support the children according to his or her state's guidelines or a separation agreement, while at the same time maintaining a separate household. This nonresidential parent may be required to provide support he or she can little afford. If the residential parent does not work outside the home, the courts might instruct the working partner to provide spousal maintenance as well. Following divorce, some people start new families and must also help support them. |
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Sharing the Responsibilities of Your Former Life |
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In many instances, especially for those who have children, divorce will change your relationship, but not sever it. As much as you might wish otherwise, you may still be bound by finances and responsibilities for years to come. |
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Even after you have left the matrimonial home, your children will need your financial support and so might your nonworking ex-spouse. What's more, while your support burden will probably be fixed, your earning power can always take a turn for the worse. If you don't get a cost-of-living increase, if you're laid off, or if your expenses are too high, you might have a difficult time making ends meet. |
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Here's a tale of woe: One evening, after the children had been tucked in and fallen soundly asleep, Helen informed her husband, Henry, that she had lost all feeling for him. No, she hadn't met anyone else, but she wanted to try. The long and the short of it: Their marriage was at an end. |
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Helen told Henry that she wanted him to move out. Shocked and dazed, he began looking for an apartment nearby. |
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