|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Tip 548: When writing, be positive or neutral in introducing the bad news. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
When you find it necessary to write your "no" message, you do not have the benefit of the rapport established by personal contacta warm smile and a firm handshake. When writing, begin by trying to establish that rapport by simply bringing up the topic in a neutral or positive way. If you're going to have to tell a subordinate you have decided not to grant the transfer, you may begin with a neutral opening: "Bill, I'm responding to your request that we consider you for the opening in the La Jolla office." This neutral opening of the topic sets the stage and a matter-of-fact tone. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Tip 549: State the reasons or your criteria for making the "No" decision if you are in a more powerful position than the other person. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
If you must tell others "no" and you want to help them understand your decision, give your reasons or your criteria before you state the "no." By the time they have listened to your explanation of the criteria upon which you based the decision, they will have already "read between the lines" to know you will be saying "no" at the end. This arrangement softens the tone of your "no'' and allows the other person to retain composure and save face in making an appropriate, accepting response. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Example: "In any transfer decision, we consider several things: tenure in the present position, total performance in similar jobs, costs of relocation, trained replacements of those who might want to move. In your case, the cost of relocation has been of major concern." By the time, you get to the "no," the listener will know it's coming. As a result, the decision will not sound so arbitrary and cold; the criteria explanation provides a cushion. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Tip 550: Remember that you generally do not have to give a reason for your "No." |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
You do not have to give explanations, but if you know the person making the request well, you probably will want to do so. An explanation is not the same as an excuse. An excuse involves making up something that sounds logical but is not the real reason. A real explanation includes your own choice and control about what the other person has asked. "Yes, we do have money in the budget for a few year-end bonuses. But I've allocated the money elsewhere. I've decided to use the money for additional training on |
|
|
|
|
|