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Tip 923 (for men): Understand when a woman states a problem involving you, she is not necessarily blaming you. |
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A statement of a problem is a statement of a problem, not an accusation. Don't feel as though you're being cited as the source. |
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QUESTIONS: RAPPORT-BUILDING OR INTRUSIVE? |
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Women use questions to stimulate conversation. They ask questions sometimes just to express interest in others and to get to know them. They hope men will reciprocate with questions of their own in return; thus, they can build camaraderie, making their working relationship more enjoyable. Men, on the other hand, don't feel such a driving need to connect emotionally. If they don't see a reason for the conversation, they may choose not to respond or to respond only minimally. Men initiate fewer questions just to encourage others to talk. |
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Results: (1) Women think some men remain aloof and are noncommunicative. (2) Men think some women invade their privacy. |
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Tip 924 (for women): Offer information about yourself and make a man's reciprocal response optional. |
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If you want to strike up a conversation with a brief acquaintance or a stranger, use statements rather than questions at the beginning. |
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Tip 925 (for women): If you choose to ask a series of questions, make them broad and general rather than narrow and personal. |
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Try to add a lead-in that explains why you're asking questions that may seem unusual. |
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Tip 926 (for men): Interpret questions as a show of interest. |
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The information shared is less important than the overture of conversation. |
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