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every morning." Not: "How's the world treating you?" But: "Jack, how're those engineers treating you?" |
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Tip 203: Gain partial credit by recalling the meeting if not the other person's name. |
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When someone approaches you and you recall the face but not the name, at least prove that you haven't forgotten the person totally. "It's nice to see you again. I believe we met at the BBA convention in Anaheim. You had just changed jobs at Kellogg. Help me with the name again." |
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You can often get people to help you by introducing them to others in your group; they'll supply the name before you have to. Bingo, you've got the name. |
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Be honest if you draw a complete blank on the name, and they offer no help. They'll know the truth, and you'll gain another strike by lying about it. Try humor: "Your name again? I have trouble remembering my own sometimes. The aging process, you know" or "I'm sorry but I'm terrible with namesI even run through my kids' names like a laundry list before I get to the one I want." |
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Tip 204: Recall to the person your topic of conversation the last time you were together. |
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Others will be flattered that you remembered, and your comment serves as proof that you did indeed pay attention and consider them important. "John, you gave me so many tips about mutual-fund investing last week. I enjoyed our talk very much." |
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Tip 205: Position yourself in the flow of traffic. |
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If you have trouble entering groups and breaking into a conversation, stand near the food, the doorway, the band, the dance floor, or the water fountain. People will surround you, and you'll have many opportunities to start conversations. When you find someone you want to spend longer than two or three minutes with, you can always move to the side and continue on a less superficial level than "opening lines." |
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Tip 206: To relax yourself, strike, up a conversation with someone who looks shy and uncomfortable. |
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That person will be grateful for someone to talk with and will respond to almost any topic you toss out. As you and the other person build up your confidence, you can part ways or bring others into your circle. |
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