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make it your business to get out in the world and meet people, you have a fairly good chance of tying the knot the second time around. |
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The bigger issue, we believe, is making this second union work. Statistics show that second marriages are even more likely to end in divorce than first unions, but yours does not have to be among these. First, understand the special pressures inherent in many second marriages. Second marriages often bring the stress of auxiliary family members, including children and ex-spouses. Even without these stresses, those marrying for the second time carry excess emotional baggage and scars. You're not two kids starting out with nothing but your hopes and dreams; you now have possessions, careers, and the emotional debris of relationships past. |
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Now, understand what you need to do to make your new marriage work. Those who succeed at second marriages have, for the most part, been able to come to terms with mistakes made during first marriages. Like Roberta, who realized she had thrived on the dependence of her first husband, Frank, they have been able to accumulate some self-awareness and insight and have come to understand their personal contribution to the marital failure that came before. These people have grown between the two marriages and have, in general, improved their problem resolution skills. |
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